Tinker, Tailor, Soldier, Sailor,
Rich man, Poor man, Beggar, Thief.
Mechanic, Artist, Pilot, Baker,
Scholar, Gardener, Dreamer, Chief.
What will I become, what dress shall I wear?
Whether cotton or silk, satin or rags?
How shall I travel? By carriage or plane?
By boat or by foot or work-a-day rail train?
Where shall I dwell? By city or lane?
On mountain or valley, cottage or plain?
Whom shall I marry? Be he kind or harsh?
Will I be content as a mother of three?
So many questions, so many roads,
Counting out futures by wishes and codes.
By my request, here are four short, original compositions by ChatGPT-5: feminist, colonial, postcolonial, and postmodern, plus a tiny bit of framing to situate their casting. - RE Slater
Quick framing (why these rewrites matter)
The classic rhyme lists mostly male-coded roles and has variants that end with “Doctor, Lawyer, Merchant… Indian Chief,” reflecting colonial stereotypes embedded in children’s play. Rewrites let us flip those defaults. Wikipedia+2Mama Lisa's World+2
1) Feminist recast - “Maker, Midwife”
Tinker, tailor, solder, suture,
Reader, writer, coder, tutor,
Glass-ceiling breaker, carer, chief—
Not your trope, nor someone’s brief.
Silk or denim, boots or lace,
Every craft a truer place;
Count the cherries, name the star—
Every role is who you are.
2) Colonial critique - “Ledger & Flag”
A tinker taxes pots to shine,
A tailor trims a borrowed line;
Soldier, sailor—ports grown wide—
Rich man counts from others’ sides.
Poor man pays, beggar’s grief,
Thief is crowned as “Indian Chief.”
Cherry stones and copper suns,
Children chant what empire runs;
Choosing “It” with tagged decree—
Tag the world, then call it free.
3) Postcolonial reversal - “After the Counting-Out”
Fisher, farmer, healer, weaver,
River-reader, seed-believer,
Archivist of stolen ground,
Speaker where the lost are found;
Cartographer of mended coasts,
Host to once-unwelcome hosts.
Now count again: repair, redress,
Return, remember, re-possess;
Where “Chief” was mask for taking land,
Chief now means a guiding hand.
4) Postmodern remix - “/tɪŋ.kə/ /ˈteɪ.lə/ [glitch]”
tinker // tailor // soldier // sailor
[copy] [paste] [strike] [errata]
rich/poor // beg/buy // give/steal
[role := interface] [self := patch]
↓
tinker?—tailor?—both—neither—
version 12.3 of me
compiles with warnings:
identity not found
(press any key to continue)
Commentary
- Imagination as inquiry – Children often ask not only about what is but what might be. Their daydreams, games, and stories are proto-philosophical experiments in possibility, where fantasy is not escape but exploration.
- Embodied wonder – Their questions are not just abstract but tied to the sensory immediacy of rain on skin, the vastness of night skies, the sudden cruelty of playground quarrels. These experiences root their philosophy in lived encounter.
- Silence and secrecy – Much of this questioning remains unspoken. Childhood philosophy is often interior, carried as a private hum beneath daily play and learning.
- Open-endedness – Unlike adult philosophy, which seeks closure or coherence, children’s questions are content to remain questions, fertile with wonder. That suspension is itself a philosophical posture - dwelling in possibility without demanding resolution.
A Childhood Meditation
by R.E. Slater & ChatGPT-5
Childhood whispers moments of truth,
that big, scary worlds are never still -
always unfolding, always re-situated,
ever becoming better or worse.
Imagination is a child’s first theology:
where play is not escape -
but everyday experiments in possibility;
where every “let’s pretend” is a 'verse
written anew in mystery and speculation.
Childhood's wonder is the soul’s grammar:
from feeling rain upon the skin,
to experiencing misery and harm;
or staring up at the vastness of night sky -
each crescendoing moment a symphonic score.
Childhood's inner consciousness holds
secrecies playing continually within;
composing quiet, unanswered riddles,
unspoken thoughts or burning tears -
forming broken worlds unmet silent needs.
Still, a child hopes, refusing disbelief -
that truth is never final, never not closed;
perhaps another journey might lead,
might yet find, healing and love;
where goodness replaces emptiness,
in embodied hugs and deep care.
In a sense, we grow up process-wise:
content in mystery because we must;
learning to dwell in imperfect worlds,
of quiet sadness we dream to abandon;
where childhood fears, sadness and loss,
might someday find closure,
and perhaps, brighter beginnings.
Common Modern version:
Common American version:
- When shall I marry?
- This year, next year, sometime, never.
- What will my husband be? (or what I be?)
- Tinker, tailor, soldier, sailor, rich-man, poor-man, beggar-man, thief.
- What will I be?
- Lady, baby, gypsy, queen.
- What shall I wear?
- Silk, satin, cotton, rags (or silk, satin, velvet, lace) (or silk, satin, muslin, rags)
- How shall I get it?
- Given, borrowed, bought, stolen.
- How shall I get to church?
- Coach, carriage, wheelbarrow, cart. (or Coach, carriage, wheelbarrow, dustbin)
- Where shall I live?
- Big house, little house, pig-sty, barn.
- When shall I marry?
History and Meaning
(nurseryrhymes.info/tinker-tailor/)
"Tinker, Tailor" is a traditional English nursery rhyme that functions primarily as a counting game and fortune-telling method. While the familiar rhyme structure likely solidified over time, earlier precedents involving lists of common professions or social roles exist from centuries past. A similar categorization of societal roles appears in William Caxton's "The Game and Playe of the Chesse," printed around 1475, which names the pawns as "Labourer, Smith, Clerk, Merchant, Physician, Taverner, Guard and Ribald." The first documented instance of the specific opening sequence—Tinker, Tailor, Soldier, Sailor—being grouped together occurs in William Congreve's play "Love for Love" from 1695, suggesting these core professions had entered common language by the late 17th century.
The rhyme serves a distinct dual function in traditional children's culture. Firstly, it works as a "counting-out" rhyme, a simple method for randomly selecting someone from a group, often to determine who will be "It" in games like tag. The process involves pointing sequentially at each participant while reciting the stressed syllables of the rhyme; the person indicated on the final syllable is chosen. This practice connects to a long history of using rhymes for selection, potentially stemming from older methods of divination by lots. Secondly, and perhaps more famously, "Tinker, Tailor" serves as a fortune-telling game, particularly for young girls seeking to divine aspects of their future. The most common purpose was to predict a future husband's profession, though it could also foretell one's own destiny.
The divination involves counting a series of items—cherry stones after eating, buttons on clothing, daisy petals, ball bounces, or rope skips—while reciting the list of professions. The profession named on the count corresponding to the final item becomes the prediction. Longer versions extend beyond occupations to include marriage timing ("This year, next year, sometime, never"), future attire ("Silk, satin, cotton, rags"), mode of transport to church, and other life details. This dual use—as both a game randomizer and fate determiner—highlights the fluid boundary between play and belief in folk practices, where simple counting formulas take on different significance depending on context and intent.
The list of professions has evolved over time with notable regional variations. The most common modern version in the UK runs: "Tinker, Tailor, Soldier, Sailor, Rich Man, Poor Man, Beggar Man, Thief." In the United States, a frequently encountered version goes: "Rich Man, Poor Man, Beggar Man, Thief, Doctor, Lawyer, Indian Chief." Earlier collected versions show further variation; James Orchard Halliwell in the 1840s recorded a button-counting rhyme starting "My belief – a captain, a colonel, a cow-boy, a thief." A.A. Milne's 1927 collection included an expanded version for counting cherry stones, adding roles like cowboy, policeman, jailer, engine driver, and rocket man. This evolution reflects changing social structures and prominent cultural archetypes across centuries, from medieval roles to maritime and military figures, stark wealth disparities, professional classes, and distinctly American characters.
Beyond its practical uses, "Tinker, Tailor" offers a window into historical perceptions of social roles and hierarchies. The listed professions span society's spectrum, from itinerant craftsmen (Tinker) and essential tradesmen (Tailor) to figures of authority (Soldier, Sailor) and the extremes of economic status (Rich Man, Poor Man, Beggar Man) and criminality (Thief). The fortune-telling focus on determining a future husband's profession underscores the historical emphasis on marriage as a primary determinant of a woman's social standing and economic security. The rhyme's cultural resonance extends into modern times, most famously in John le Carré's espionage novel "Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy," but also in works by Ellery Queen and Tom Clancy, and even as a Marvel Comics title, demonstrating how these simple verses continue to echo through contemporary creative expressions.
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